Musings from Neal Lemery, an Oregon Coast writer, poet, painter, and a bit of a guitar player
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
Thursday, September 1, 2016
Suicide: Getting to Resilient
Five
percent. One out of twenty. That’s the reality of our community, our
country. Within the last year, one out
of twenty adults seriously considered ending their life.
Suicide. It is an epidemic, and we don’t talk about it
much. Suicide talk is taboo. Don’t go there. But, we must.
Every
person needs to be connected to at least one other person, and to be able to
reach out, talk about depression, sadness, and hopelessness. We all need hope, an expectation that there
is a tomorrow, there is opportunity for change, that our lives make a
difference, and that life is worth living. Life’s problems can’t be only on our
own shoulders.
Last week,
I was part of a workshop, getting trained with skills to take on this intensely
personal problem, to be a first responder in addressing suicide in our
culture. Applied Suicide Intervention
Skills Training (ASIST) is a national movement to develop a first response
model in our communities. Evidence based
models and techniques gave us the tools and the confidence to reach out and
connect with someone who is possibly contemplating ending their life.
Invite a
conversation, and plunge into the “perfect storm” that is roaring through their
lives, and make connection. When the
signs are there, find the courage to “ask the question” and begin talking about
suicide, and options for change, connecting them with you and connecting them
with resources to be able to move ahead with their lives, and regain hope.
Suicidal
thoughts have stormed through my own life, sometimes ending lives far too
early, or paralyzing people with deep depression and isolation. Surviving family and friends are wracked with
uncertainly and chaos, leaving profound questions unanswered and lives thrown
off track.
Making
connections is what changes lives and saves lives. What I’ve learned in life, and relearned at
the ASIST training, is that you do connect.
You do reach out, engage people, and show your genuine concern for them
and their well-being. You connect with
your own humanity and your fellows, and make that vital one to one connection.
Showing
concern and empathy, and making that connection often saves lives and gives
people a new sense of hope and possibility in their lives.
Help make
them safe now, and help them develop their plan to be safe now.
When you
have that conversation, make those connections, one to one. And, help them connect with others; not only with
friends and family, but professional care givers and health care
providers. Be the gatekeeper for them
and help them find their way.
The
National Suicide Prevention Hot Line, 1-800-243-8255(TALK) is a valuable resource. I’ve added it to my phone
contacts. Other resources:
http://suicidepreventionlifeline.org, Youthline (1-877-YOUTH-911) and their
text: TEEN2TEEN@839863.
Connect
with your local mental health services provider. In my hometown, Tillamook, their crisis line
is 800-962-2851.
All of
these services operate 24 hours a day, because suicide is a 24 hour a day issue
of community wide concern.
Help build
a resilient, safe community.
----Neal
Lemery 9/1/2016
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